Conversations with a Pre*Teen
“He knows some shit”
While riding in the car to school this morning, the song “drunk on a plane” by Dierks Bentley was on the radio softly playing the background of our morning conversations. Reilly, my 12 year old was singing along.
Trying not to make a big deal about it, I chime in.
“It’s not that appropriate for a kid to say ‘drunk’. Do you know what that even means?” I say, knowing that he knew what the word was, to an extent. I mean, at 12, you’ve already seen some shit and heard some shit.
“Yeah, Mom, I know what it means.” He says with his pre-teen “know-it-all” attitude.
“Okay, can you tell me what you think it means?” I ask.
“It’s when you drink too much alcohol.” He proceeds opening his eyes freakishly wide. “It affects your minnnnnnnnnnnd and makes you act all crazy and lose your thoughts.” He pauses for a brief second. “It hurts your brain.” He says all theatrically, waving his arms all around in an ape like manner.
“Oh yeah!?” I asked, trying not to laugh.
“Yeah, it’s like this for an example.” He starts in seriously.
“I think this might be the best way I can describe it. It’s like a phone that needs to be updated. It lags before the update, then it updates, resets, rests and it gets better. It works better.”
“Ohhh?” I asked, trying to understand his thought process of relating being “drunk” to a phone that needs to be updated. 🤷🏼♀️
“Yeah, it’s like not working. Your brain isn’t working and it makes all your internal organs and insides mad and not work.” He says with distinct truth.
“Oh, that’s an interesting comparison, Reilly.” I say, trying to say as little as possible. I can see the wheels moving and he has more to say…
“It impairs your function, mom.” He explains.
I paused. I let his knowledge of this topic sink in for a moment and I quickly realized that I am thankful for having this impromptu conversation about real life with him.
“You. Are. Absolutely. Right. It does impair your basic functions. Like walking, talking or driving…” I stated.
Being blown away with his knowledge of how alcohol affects your body I had to ask…
“So, where did you learn all of that, Reilly?” I ask, in hopes he doesn’t tell an embarrassing story he witnessed. 🙈
“I learned it watching a documentary!” He exclaims.
(phewwwwww)
“Okay…” I say, knowing he has watched many documentaries in his short existence.
“But, you do know… talking about being drunk isn’t appropriate for your age… and….”
“I know mom.” Reilly interrupts.
“Okay, because you aren’t even allowed to drink alcohol until you’re 21. When you turn 21 you can decide for yourself what you want to do. Some people take drinking alcohol to the extreme and don’t know when they need to stop. This makes them drunk and impairs their judgement and sometimes they make very bad choices. Like getting behind the wheel and driving…” I say again with a very serious voice. Since we are driving, I thought it was fitting.
“They also make choices to stay home and hang out with their friends being silly until like 3 in the morning, mom” He says, laughing like he’s seen or knows something.
“Yeah, that’s true Reilly. Those are called responsible drunk people.” I say laughing back.
If I can do anything with my children, I want to be open and honest with them. I want to teach them about their choices in life and how each choice can make a difference in their path in life. But, mostly I want them to know it’s always their choice. I can only hope they make the best choice. I can only hope I have raised them in the direction they must go by being an example. Not a perfect example, but a real one.
I love having these random conversations with my pre-teen. Although he drives me insane at times and I seriously worry about his future, it’s times like this that I am reassured that he has a good head on his shoulders and that he will ultimately make the good choices. Even if making a few bad ones along the way teach him that.
Love and Laughs!
April
p.s. Just for fun: Dierks Bentley Drunk on a Plane
Every Day In April 
You said it!